People often say that perception is reality. However, in the wake of storm concerning Martha Stewart, it should be apparent that perception (particularly, public perception) is anything but reality. Just two years ago, Stewart was the media's ideal of the quintessential American businesswoman. She was called a "genius," a "pioneer," and a "role model." Yet, following her conviction, the media has begun calling her string of other names (none of which have been nearly as flattering).

In just twenty four months, the public perception of Martha Stewart has been turned completely upside down. However, has the "real" Martha Stewart changed so radically during this time period? Of course not. The simple truth of the matter is that public perceptions are almost never accurate. People are either praised or pummeled but almost never are they seen as real, flesh and blood individuals; people with virtues and faults.

This is important for each of us to remember because we all have a public perception. Of course, most of us don't have our own television shows, magazines and publicly-traded companies, but we do have a "public." It consists of our friends, our families, our business colleagues, the people with whom we attend church, the members of our country club or social service organization, etc.

And just the like the general public, your public has a perception of your abilities, talents and character. And as you begin to make the most of your dash, that perception will change. Many of these changes will be positive as people begin to recognize a "new" you. And sadly, some of these changes will be negative. As you become more focused on your destiny, you will appear aloof, selfish and a "stick in the mud" to some of your old acquaintances. Unfortunately, it goes with the territory.

This is why it's critical for you to adopt the philosophy of the famous book title by Terry Cole-Whitaker, What You Think about Me is None of My Business, because it isn't. Other peoples' opinions of you are just that; their opinions. The only opinion of you that matters is your own. You must never confuse the real you - the one that is destined for greatness - with your public perception. Otherwise, the results can be disastrous.

This is something I know about first-hand. As a child, the perception of my teachers and classmates was that I was a loser. As I've said many times before, my high school guidance counselor labeled me "Most Likely Not to Succeed." For the first few years of my adult life, I assumed the role that others defined for me. As a result, I floated from dead-end job to dead-end job, accomplishing very little. Fortunately, one day, I had the good fortune to meet a person who saw something in me at a time when I didn't see it in myself. Over time, my own perception of my abilities changed and my life was changed forever.

Therefore, by all means, don't let the perceptions of others keep you from having the life you deserve. It doesn't matter if your friends doubt your ability to complete a marathon or not. Likewise, it doesn't matter if your boss and co-workers don't believe you can lead the company in sales. Nor does it matter whether anyone believes in your ability to start a business, write a best seller or make enough money in real estate to retire by 40. The only thing that matters is that you think you can do it, and that you go out and prove yourself right.

On the other side of the coin, it's important not to take too much stock in the good opinion of others. Interestingly, almost as many people are hurt by the good opinions of others as by bad opinions. If you happen to be surrounded by supportive and nurturing people, then consider yourself blessed. However, their high opinion of you isn't enough to make your dreams a reality. That's going to require hard work and persistence on your part.

Sadly, we've all witnessed what happens when people substitute the praise of others for hard work. They become like the star athlete who signs a big contract only to never again perform at the same level again. Remember, your public perception is usually based on your past performance but your ultimate success in life is based on your present and future performance. Therefore, you must be mindful not to let the praise of others go to your head.

Of course, the easiest way to prevent this from happening is to pay little attention to your fans and critics (and yes, you will have both). When your fans begin to sing your praises, don't hire an orchestra and rent out Carnegie Hall. Instead, just hum along as you continue your work. Likewise, when your critics begin to boo and hiss, don't hang your head and walk away in shame. Instead, hold your chin up, stand tall and resolve that you will ride out this wave of negative public perception. Remember, the only perception of you that can sink your dreams is your own.